i’m mellllllllllltinggggggggggggggggggggggggggg
hour 10 of work, only 4 more to go :] :] :]
10.18.14 /05:14/ 1

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going away until saturday to observe on some big telescopes


This Is What Developing Acute Schizophrenia Feels Like
A year ago this winter, I began to not recognize myself. 
Sleep was the first thing to change. Progressively, over the course of about two weeks, I began struggling to drift off. As a 24-year-old man with a good supply of hash, this had never been a problem before. It was so odd. Seemingly out of the blue, I’d get into bed at night and not be able to shut off my brain. Thoughts would grow tendrils and loop onto other thoughts, tangling together like a big wall of ivy. Some nights, I’d pull the covers over my head, grab my face hard in my hands, and whisper, “Shut. The. Fuck. Up.”
Eventually I would be able to get to sleep, but I’d wake up feeling peculiar, like I had forgotten to do or tell someone something. Hunger wasn’t as aggressive as it usually was during this time, either. Normally I bolt downstairs to pour a heaping bowl of Frosted Flakes the second my eyes open. Instead, I woke each morning with a sick, creeping feeling in my gut. Still, I carried on as normal, thinking I’d just lay off the hash for a bit. That was probably it. I wasn’t panicked. 
I carried on my work at a local wine shop and tried to push what was happening during the night to the back of my mind. I got through the days OK, if slightly bleary-eyed—but looking back now I can see that I had started to struggle with simple conversations. 
If my boss told me to check a delivery, it’d take me a few seconds to process what he was saying, like two or three people had said it at the same time and I couldn’t make out the clear instruction. Looking at morning delivery slips and trying to make sense of them in my head was like trying to make out a tree in the fog—possible, but hard.

"Mental illness is no different from physical illness—it just involves a different organ: the brain."
10.15.14 /23:35/ 3451

The Suicide of Lucretia (Detail) Meester met de Papegaai,1525.
10.15.14 /22:56/ 14792

Algernon Cadwallader
Ilford 3200
Mamiya m645
10.15.14 /22:32/ 1518

OK, so we got a trooper pulls someone over, we got a shooting, these folks drive by, there’s a high-speed pursuit, ends here and then this execution-type deal.

10.12.14 /14:46/ 50
10.12.14 /14:45/ 4965

rotation wave
twit • giphy • insta • vine 
10.11.14 /12:54/ 3624


Nanna Hänninen

1. Plant VI, 2011

2. Plant VII, 2011


d i g i t a l VT105 computer made by Digital Equipment Corporation, Laboratory Data Products Group MR-2-4/M 16, Massachusetts, 1981.
10.08.14 /23:31/ 37
Canvas  by  andbamnan